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Welcome

Come in please.

Sit down, take a deep breath and relax. You are safe here.

This is a place where you can learn about Sex Addiction and find support and comfort by reading stories from other men and women who have had similar experiences, just like your own. If you think your partner is a Sex Addict or a Porn Addict, then you have come to the right place. Take your time and browse through the articles and stories which I think will help you understand just what Sex Addiction is and how it affects the partners and families of a Sex Addict.

My name is JoAnn and I am married to a Sex Addict. This site, and the book I am writing, is for anyone who loves or cares about a Sex Addict. Also available here is a series of eBooks, which I have written, that I feel will help you with specific issues in dealing with your partner’s Sex Addiction.

Here you will find real stories of real men and women who are in a relationship with a Sex Addict. If you browse through the site you will also find articles that I have written that may help you during this difficult time.

Women–Do You Need Support?

I have found that the most important thing that women need, when they discover that their husbands or partners have been engaging in secret sexual activities, is support. We need someone to talk with, someone who will understand, someone who will not judge or blame us.

The Sisterhood Of Support is an informational website which includes a private membership support group for women who are in a relationship with a Sex Addict. Many women cannot afford expensive counseling or intensives or cannot find a counselor in their area. I receive many e-mails and calls from women who need support but just cannot find or afford it. So, I put together a very inexpensive, friendly, helpful and supportive  place where you can could find all the help, friendship, resources, information and support that you need. For only $15.00 per month, this support group is available 24/7, offers complete privacy, exclusive resources, articles and stories and the ability to share and connect with other women who are in various phases of their crisis.

In the private membership area of the Sisterhood site you can share your experiences, ask questions of me or the other Sisters, start forum topics or comment in the forums and chat live with the other members who are also going through the same difficulties as you. You can find out more about the Sisterhood Of Support by clicking here or just click on the ‘Join The Support Group’ tab on the menu at the top of the page.

A Message For Men Who Are Partners Of Sex Addicts.

When I started this website almost five years ago I focused on women who were in a relationship with a Sex Addict. The women who came on this site were adamant that no men were allowed. They wanted a safe place to share and vent. I monitored the site and removed any comments from men and sadly had to answer their e-mails with the ‘no men allowed’ mantra. In order to provide a safe and completely private place for these women I created the Sisterhood Of Support, which requires a membership to view, share and comment.

Recently I have receive so many e-mails from men who also need support and resources that I have decided to welcome men who are involved with a Sex Addict to share and comment here on this site. Please send your stories via the Contact Page or directly to me at JoAnn@marriedtoasexaddict.com and feel free to comment on any of the posts here. After all, the pain and trauma of discovery transcends gender or orientation.

I am also putting together a membership site that will offer a private place where men can share, chat, use the forum and find resources for their issues. Keep checking back for updates on that.

Please understand that if you find references to ‘she’ or ‘her’ or ‘husband’ that this site was originally written for women, but the information certainly applies to all.

lg share en Welcome

Grieving Your Losses Part 1

When you find out that your spouse or partner is a Sex Addict a piece of you dies. You lose your sense of reality and equilibrium, your self esteem, your lifestyle, your hope and your trust. It’s as if everything you believed in and everything that existed has suddenly been shattered. The world you thought [...] [...]

Staggered Disclosures

Why can’t they just tell me everything and get it over with?

That is probably the most painful cry of spouses and partners of Sex Addicts. We get information in bits and pieces, or as one woman put it, ‘on the installment plan’. Even when confronted with black and white evidence Sex Addicts just can’t [...] [...]

When You’re Sad Listen To This

This is one of my favorite videos. It’s a great song, has phenomenal editing and it makes me remember just how important we all are to each other. Stay connected and stand by each other.

Never doubt that a small, group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only [...] [...]

I Need A Change

Don’t be surprised if you see new colors and unfamiliar backgrounds here– it’s still the same place with a fresh coat of paint. I decided it was time for a change and I am  still working through some of the glitches, but hopefully all will work well with my new look.

Just because everything is [...] [...]

COSA Revisited

Well, I went to my second COSA meeting this week [...]

Excerpt From The Book ‘Married To A Sex Addict’

Everything You NEVER WANTED TO KNOW About Sex Addiction

Okay, you know all the definitions and, like myself, you may even wonder if Sex Addiction is a real disease or just a convenient cop out for bad behavior. But, semantics aside, the problem is very real, so let me put in my two cents and [...] [...]

Does COSA Help Or Hurt Spouses Of Sex Addicts?

I still have major objections to the implication that a spouse or partner of a sex addict needs to accept the tenants of the 12 steps. [...]

Sex Addiction–Fact or Fiction?

Is there really such a thing as Sexual Addiction? Is Sex Addiction an uncontrollable, inbred, genetic disorder that cannot be reversed or cured? Is Sex Addiction a psychological disorder brought about by childhood trauma or abuse? Or, are Sex Addicts simply self-centered, immature and immoral jerks; individuals who lack impulse control and who seek pleasurable [...] [...]

“I Wasn’t Unfaithful” comments

Here are some interesting comments from some of my friends about my last post–thank you everyone for sharing:

Yes, when a sex addict acts out, it is cheating. The only difference between the cheating a non-addict might engage in and the cheating a sex addict engages in is the relationship the cheater has with the [...] [...]

‘I Wasn’t Unfaithful’

Can you believe that? After years of separation, counseling, 12 step meetings, soul searching and an ungodly amount of time spent in discussions over his addiction, my husband had the nerve to claim that he had never cheated on me.

Okay, let’s see, hundreds of hookers, three to five times a week, sometimes twice a [...] [...]

Media Coverage Of Sex Addiction Can Help Alleviate Shame

Wow! You can’t get more mainstream than the Wall Street Journal! In my research I ran across this article and was impressed by it’s no-nonsense approach and helpful links.

Oprah, Good Morning America, Dr. Phil and many others in the media have done much to educate the public about the problem of Sex Addiction and [...] [...]

Addiction Recovery

Probably the most controversial issue surrounding addictions of all types is recovery. Most recovery programs are based on the AA 12 step model. Statistics are difficult to decipher and recovery rates vary from 5% to almost 100%. The higher stats don’t take into account all the members who come to a few meetings and, for [...] [...]

It’s Always About The Lies

From my journal:

It always comes down to this when dealing with a Sex Addict.

It’s not about what they do, although that is vitally important, it’s more about what they say. It’s always about the lies. The lies will get you every time. The lies will cause the doubts. The lies will [...] [...]

Addicted To Sex or Dopamine?

Dopamine is a naturally produced chemical that stimulates certain parts of our brains during pleasurable activities such as sex. For that reason it has been dubbed the ‘pleasure chemical’. [...]

Fostering Myths About Sex Addiction

As if spouses and partners of Sex Addicts don’t have enough problems sometimes the media just adds to our grief by perpetuating myths thinly cloaked as science. While searching the internet for resources for my book I came across an article claiming that Sex Addiction is in the genes.

“The new research centres on a [...] [...]