Sex Addiction

All about Sex Addiction. What is Sex Addiction? Old and new methods of recovery, pros and cons of 12 step groups, co dependency, co addiction. What it is

J Shares Her Story of Marriage with a Sex Addict

For you to share with my blessing, hoping it will do some good for someone as well as allow me to release a little bit of pain.  Please just call me J.

Thanks!

Here is my story. It is exhausting to tell. I feel like I need to tell it though, because for the first time in my life my silence and shame about being married to a sex addict is ending and I am opening up to sharing and hence, erasing the fear. Forgive me if my details are confusing at any point. I have large portions of memory/time that are lost to me. I guess we can experience something like PTSD when we have internalized being married to an addict for so long. What do you think? I am intelligent, capable and loving, from a loving childhood home, yet I have not escaped the pain of sex addiction in my marriage. (more…)

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Anatomy of a Sex Addict with Multiple Addictions. Thora’s Story.

Those of you who have been following this site know that I recently censured a comment posted by a reader named thora1. I did this because it contained graphic descriptions of her sexual behaviors.

I have decided to post her story here, with just a few portions deleted and with my thoughts placed within her story in bold. The reason that I have chosen to feature Thora’s story is because she is an active Sex Addict with multiple addictions who is in a relationship with another Sex Addict who is also a drug addict.

Why should we care about this? Well, first, because she is a woman in pain who has reached out to us. And, in addition, her minimizing and denial is so perfectly articulated I felt that my readers would get a better understanding of how Sex Addicts tick.

I have been brutally critical with Thora and I hope she will understand that the only way she can ever recover is to face her addictions and do the things she must to change her life. It will be interesting to see if she is up to the challenge.

Here is her original story with my comments in bold. (more…)

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I Am Not A Co-Sex Addict!

I have seen a troubling trend, especially within the scientific community. That trend is the labeling of those involved with a Sex Addict, or any addict for that matter, as a co-addict. Because counselors and Sex Addiction treatment centers look toward the scientific community for guidance I expect to soon see the term co-addict routinely used to indicate someone who is in a relationship with a Sex Addict.

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My Boundaries For My Sex Addict Husband

Today I was looking through my journals (all electronic files on the computer), e-mails and chats that were written before and during my marriage to my Sex Addict husband.

Time does give us a different perspective on things. Even last year I would get depressed whenever I read those files. All the pain and anger would come rushing back as if it were happening right then.

Now, with almost three years of complete sobriety under our belts I am able to read those words with a remote objectivity. I see so many things that I did wrong, and so many that I did right.

This letter made me laugh. I guess I was just as ballsy back then as I am now. I hope it makes you smile. It’s word for word, unedited, written in August of 2007–almost three years after I first found out about his addiction and while we were still living apart in two different states.  At this time we were considering moving back in together, but I still had my doubts. (more…)

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