I Need A Change
Don't be surprised if you see new colors and unfamiliar backgrounds here-- it's still the same place with a fresh coat of paint. I decided it was time for a…
All about Sex Addiction. What is Sex Addiction? Old and new methods of recovery, pros and cons of 12 step groups, co dependency, co addiction. What it is
Sex Addiction–Fact or Fiction?
Is there really such a thing as Sexual Addiction? Is Sex Addiction an uncontrollable, inbred, genetic disorder that cannot be reversed or cured? Is Sex Addiction a psychological disorder brought about by childhood trauma or abuse? Or, are Sex Addicts simply self-centered, immature and immoral jerks; individuals who lack impulse control and who seek pleasurable experiences without considering the consequences?
Ask ten counselors or psychiatrists and you will probably get at least that many answers. The major 12 step groups for Sex Addicts have varying but similar views (more…)
“I Wasn’t Unfaithful” comments
Here are some interesting comments from some of my friends about my last post–thank you everyone for sharing:
Yes, when a sex addict acts out, it is cheating. The only difference between the cheating a non-addict might engage in and the cheating a sex addict engages in is the relationship the cheater has with the cheating. For a non-addict, the cheating may be a symptom of a particularly tough time in his life, marriage problems, etc.–it’s a way to cope with a specific, isolated situation in his /her life. For a sex addict, on the other hand, sex is what he/she uses to cope repeatedly with almost every uncomfortable emotion or situation over a long period of time, often a lifetime.
In that sense, some people might argue that the cheating a non-addict does is worse than the cheating an addict does because it’s nothing personal against his/her spouse–it’s just the way the addict deals with everything and he would cheat (more…)
‘I Wasn’t Unfaithful’
Can you believe that? After years of separation, counseling, 12 step meetings, soul searching and an ungodly amount of time spent in discussions over his addiction, my husband had the…
Media Coverage Of Sex Addiction Can Help Alleviate Shame
Wow! You can’t get more mainstream than the Wall Street Journal! In my research I ran across this article and was impressed by it’s no-nonsense approach and helpful links.
Oprah, Good Morning America, Dr. Phil and many others in the media have done much to educate the public about the problem of Sex Addiction and as the public becomes more aware of the seriousness of this issue the stigma and sensationalism of the topic will hopefully decline. I am optimistic that this education of the masses will have a positive ripple effect on all Sex Addicts.
Sexual Addiction is based on shame. The addict, for whatever reason, (more…)
Addiction Recovery
Probably the most controversial issue surrounding addictions of all types is recovery. Most recovery programs are based on the AA 12 step model. Statistics are difficult to decipher and recovery rates vary from 5% to almost 100%. The higher stats don’t take into account all the members who come to a few meetings and, for whatever reason, never return. Of course, those who stay will claim a 100% recovery rate.
Scientific data on the 12 step programs show that the recovery rate is almost exactly the same as no intervention at all, which will result in a spontaneous recovery of about 5% of addicts. It is unfortunate that the mindset of our society is (more…)
It’s Always About The Lies
From my journal: It always comes down to this when dealing with a Sex Addict. It's not about what they do, although that is vitally important, it's more about what…
Addicted To Sex or Dopamine?
Dopamine is a naturally produced chemical that stimulates certain parts of our brains during pleasurable activities such as sex. For that reason it has been dubbed the 'pleasure chemical'.
Fostering Myths About Sex Addiction
As if spouses and partners of Sex Addicts don't have enough problems sometimes the media just adds to our grief by perpetuating myths thinly cloaked as science. While searching the…
Can Medication Help Sex Addicts?
This article was originally published on June 14, 2009 and updated on March 5, 2019. Medications serve an important role in the treatment of mental disorders so I wondered, can…
A New Book For Spouses Of Sex Addicts
Hello everyone! Welcome to my new blog. My name is JoAnn and I am married to a Sex Addict. Needless to say, the last four years, and the two years before my marriage, have been stressful, painful, disruptive and emotionally devastating. But, amid the chaos there also came a sense of growth, understanding and knowledge.
When I found out that my husband of three and a half months had a thousand dollar a month prostitute habit, my life fell apart. I sought help through counseling and my family endured my pain with grace and restraint. Fortunately I have a great support system (more…)